Local Diwali Celebration Devolves into Rosh Hashanah

What began as a quiet candlelight night celebrating the Indian holiday “Diwali” ended with riotous Rosh Hashanah.

Indian students from across Boston gathered yesterday evening to celebrate

Diwali – a most dazzling holiday – by bringing hundreds of candles. Each candle represents good’s triumph over evil in every human being, as if you haven’t heard that story already. The event was held in the Lowell courtyard, the most South Asian of all of Harvard’s houses. But as the festivities wore on, and the bottles of Bombay Sapphire grew empty, increasing numbers of Indian students texted their Jewish friends, calling upon them to come and celebrate Diwali.

The Jews did not get the memo, however, and raced over wearing the Yarmulkas. Then, Rosh Hashanah happened.

Amidst the sea of brown and white, Tandoor and Latka, Indians and Jews together began to recite the Jewish prayer, the Sh’ma, as a Torah appeared literally out of nowhere.

Thus the night ended will a full-on Rosh Hashanah service, with several drunken Indians and Jews giving their interpretations of that day’s Parashot.

The next day, they all unsuccessfully interviewed for jobs with hedge funds.

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